Maria's Child Abuse and Neglect of Our Daughter

Maria’s Medical Neglect

Maria has a long and continuous history of medical neglect of our daughter. The following is a non-exhaustive summary of this neglect:

1. Maria declined a newborn hearing screening when our daughter was born;
2. Maria was given a referral to Prairie Family Medicine for our daughter to receive a hearing screen shortly after birth, and Maria declined to have this done;
3. Maria did not get a hearing screen for our daughter for more than three years, despite repeated recommendations by medical professionals, our daughter’s speech therapist, and my insistence to have it done;
4. Maria declined the critical congenital heart disease (CCHD) screening when our daughter was born;
5. Maria declined the “car seat challenge” and car seat tolerance screen (CSTS) (qualified by hospital protocol due to prolonged oxygen needed after resuscitation) when our daughter was born;
6. Maria declined the newborn metabolic screening when our daughter was born.
7. Maria had inadequate prenatal care;
8. Maria declined Vitamin K when our daughter was born;
9. Maria declined the hepatitis B vaccine when our daughter was born;
10. Maria refused to have “well child checks” for our daughter for about 20 months. A report from Prairie Family Medicine on 10/28/2022 noted, “Mother states she is hesitant to bring our daughter in for appts due to their decision to not vaccinate” [note: this was Maria’s decision alone];
11. Maria has missed recommended dental appointments. Prairie Family Medicine noted during an 11/18/2022 visit, “Our daughter has not seen a dentist”;
12. Maria has refused all recommended vaccinations for our daughter (DTaP, Polio, MMR, Act-Hib, PedvaxHib, Hepatitis B, Varicella, Hepatitis A, Pneumococcal, Rotarix, RotaTeq) despite recommendations by medical professionals that our daughter be vaccinated. Maria did allow our daughter to have the DTaP vaccination on 5/31/2024, 7/2/2024, and 9/3/2024—more than three years later than recommended.

Hiding Medical Decisions

Maria has a long and continuous history of making unilateral decisions about our daughter’s healthcare, including claiming she was speaking for me, without my knowledge including denying treatments listed, signing vaccination waiver forms without my knowledge or consent, and canceling and interfering with medical appointments when I have attempted to get treatment for our daughter, notably, my repeated attempts to get a hearing test for our daughter.

Defamation to Conceal The Medical Neglect

Maria has a history of lying to medical professionals, social workers, and the IDHW in order to blame me for our daughter’s medical issues, to convince medical professionals to give her primary decision making authority, and to get medical professionals to take her side when there has been disagreement between us. Notably, she has spread the lie throughout the community that I made our daughter vegan, with Maria claiming that this was the cause of our daughter’s health issues.

In stark contrast, I have never declined medical treatment for our daughter, and I have always wanted our daughter to receive all recommended care.

From the time when our daughter was born until 2/7/2023, I worked full-time outside of the home and Maria was a stay-at-home mother. Maria had a strong preference to handle our daughter’s medical appointments since she was a stay-at-home mother and she had strong opinions highly critical of standard medical care. Maria and I agreed that she would handle all of our daughter’s medical appointments.

Shortly after our daughter’s birth, I became aware that Maria had declined vaccinations and the hearing test. I told Maria I was concerned about our daughter’s hearing, and Maria mocked me when I would clap in an attempt to gauge our daughter’s hearing. I had always wanted our daughter to receive vaccinations, but I did not push for it, as Maria was extremely opposed to vaccinations, and I wanted to keep the peace. I was unaware of the other treatments Maria declined—minus the hearing screening—only becoming aware of them when I requested hospital records in February 2023.

My Concern and Actions

In December 2022, I had become concerned about our daughter’s weight as she appeared to me to be underweight. I asked Maria to provide me with records of our daughter’s health and she refused, telling me I would have to make an appointment if I wanted to get information about our daughter’s health.

Maria scheduled an appointment for myself and our daughter on 2/7/2023 at Prairie Family Medicine. At this appointment, our daughter was diagnosed as “failure to thrive” for being malnourished. In addition, the provider told me that Maria had told them that I made our daughter vegan, saying that this was the cause of our daughter’s diagnosis of “failure to thrive.” During our divorce proceedings, Maria admitted in her response to my interrogatories, that I did not make our daughter vegan. I have never been vegetarian or vegan, so the accusation came as a shock.

It was during the 2/7/2023 medical appointment that Maria called the Prairie Family Medicine office multiple times to interfere with the appointment. It’s not clear what Maria told them, but after her interfering phone calls, we were told that both of us would have to be at appointments, and that they would not see our daughter with either of us alone.

Immediately following the 2/7/2023 medical appointment, I went home and demanded to take charge of our daughter’s diet. I confronted Maria about her false accusation that I made our daughter vegan. I was deeply afraid for our daughter’s health, and I sincerely believed I was being framed for our daughter’s decline. After I took charge of our daughter’s diet, she went from weighing 22.16 lbs on 2/7/2023 to 24.219 lbs on 2/27/2023, a weight gain of 2.059 lbs in only 20 days. This was the fastest she’s ever gained weight before or since. On 11/24/2023 she weighed 27.8 lbs, so she had a weight gain of 3.581 lbs from the time I left the family home until 11/24/2023.